"Wait, you're a lesbian?"

Nothing in the world makes me more mad than when people learn that I'm a lesbian, and they say "But you don't look like a lesbian?" I don't think people mean it rude, or malicious, they just don't understand. Today I'm going to take about a couple of things I've had to deal with people saying to me in the last three years after coming out.

"You don't dress like a lesbian"// Just because I dress more ladylike doesn't mean I'm not a lesbian. And on the other side, just because a girl dresses more like a tomboy does not essentially make them a lesbian. The type of clothes we wear do not determine our sexuality.

"You don't look like a lesbian"// This goes right along with "You don't dress like a lesbian". So um. What exactly does a lesbian look like? I have long hair. I wear dresses. I dress up more often. I wear makeup. And that is supposed to automatically make me straight?

"Wait, like have you ever like, had a crush on me?"// Okay, just because I'm gay, and I'm friends with you, and you're a girl, does not mean that I've had a crush on you or still do. Get off your high horse because chances are, no I have not, do not and never will have a crush on you. You don't like all of your guy friends, and I don't like all of my girl friends.

"Bro, stay away from my girl, bro"// #1, I'm not your bro. #2, I don't want your girl. I'm a respectable girl, and I'm not going to steal her away from you. Promise.

"So yeah, my girlfriend has this amazing ass"// Congrats. I don't care. I don't want to talk about your girlfriend, or your sex life. Just because I'm a lesbian does not mean I want to hear about your girlfriend.

"You must hate all guys, right?"// No. I don't. I actually prefer being friends with guys. Like every girl has ever said, there's less drama. Guys don't care about anything. And the fact that I'm not attracted to boys, makes being friends with guys that much less weird.

"You must be an atheist, right?"// I'm sure every gay person has gotten some point of this question at some point. JUST BECAUSE I'M GAY DOES NOT MEAN I DO NOT BELIEVE IN GOD. I do believe in God. I go to church every Sunday, I've taken bible classes all four years of high school. I know what the bible says. I understand it. I do hope to one day go to a church that is more liberal and openminded.

"Yo, check out the ass on that one"// Alright guys. I'm not your best friend. We're not going to check out girls and fist bump. I don't want to sit around and look at girl's asses and talk with you about girls, or which one's hot, which one is not. I don't have any interest in doing that with you. ALSO, I do not think every girl is hot.

"You just haven't found a man." "It's just a phase"// I do not want a man. I have not found a man because I do not want a man. I love my girlfriend. She's got everything I need right there. And it is absolutely under no circumstances and in no way a phase. I like girls. I'm a lesbian. I do not like men. Do not EVER tell me it is a phase. It is most definitely not a phase. Thank you.

And finally.....

"You guys met through softball right? Ha ha"// Okay my girlfriend and I actually did meet through softball. BUT, not every lesbian couple has met through softball. Do not go around assuming that lesbians only meet through softball or any other sport.

These are just a few that I've experienced, and that annoy the crap out of me.

Lesbians, what are some things that have been said to you? Straight girls, has anyone assumed you were gay? What kind of things do you get asked that offend you?

Preppy Little Lesbian


  1. So while I'm straight, one of my good friends is a lesbian. And she's proud of and open about it, which is awesome. Yet whenever we hang out and talk to people and it comes up that she's a lesbian, people automatically assume we're dating, and she gets so annoyed lol. She's like UM...CAN I NOT HAVE STRAIGHT GIRL FRIENDS?! Same with whenever she posts a picture with another girl. She once posted a picture of her and her COUSIN as her profile, and people commented how they made a cute couple. ...awks. Also, I've never ever heard the softball stereotype haha!

    Chloe | Wanderlust in the Midwest

    1. HAHAHA. That's actually kind of funny! While it's never happened to me, because I've only been out and dating my girlfriend, but I do see how it could definitely happen to some lesbians! I have tons of straight girl friends, actually that's really all I have, and everyone's cool about it, and no one assumes I'm dating anyone!


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